What is secondary wounding?

What is Secondary Wounding? Secondary wounding occurs when people who have experienced trauma are met with unsupportive responses to their pain. It is not surprising that not everyone can provide empathic responses to another’s pain story. However, it is the friends, family members, and those in the ‘helping’ profession (counsellors, police officers, social workers, clergy, […]

Physical Impacts of Trauma and How to Foster Resolution

Physical Impacts of Trauma and How to Foster Resolution BRAIN ARCHITECTURE: Shrinkage in the prefrontal cortex, corpus callosum, and hippocampus, as well as enlarged amygdala (causing increased reactivity). ADDRESS HEALING by fostering safe, stable, and nurturing relationships ~ safe relationships override stress hormones by increasing the level of oxytocin, a hormone that inhibits the amygdala […]

Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN)

Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) Unlike abuse and maltreatment which are adverse actions taken by a parent/caregiver towards a child, childhood emotional neglect (CEN) is mostly a parent/caregiver’s failure to act. Many people like myself who experienced CEN were well provided for in necessities (and in my case, even luxuries). ECN can certainly be intentional; however, […]

Strategies for Managing Flashbacks

Strategies for Managing Flashbacks ~Tell yourself “I am having a flashback” ~Center yourself: Centering focuses on your internal being “I am here”. Putting your hand on your chest can help with this as it releases oxytocin and decreases cortisol levels.  This is simple, yet very impactful.  ~Ground yourself: Grounding focuses on your external being “I […]

Trauma: You can’t *think* your way out of it

Trauma: You can’t *think* your way out of it Our conscious mind processes 40 things in a single second, whereas our unconscious mind is processing 20,000 things in a single second (that is a whooping 500,000 times faster). Our unconscious mind is assessing for threat based on past lived experience, even when we do not […]

Counter-Dependence

Counter-Dependence Most people are familiar with the term “co-dependency”. Co-dependency often presents as a caring individual supporting another individual to a detriment to both themselves and the person that they are trying to “help”. The co-dependent person loses connection with Self (putting their overall wellbeing at risk) and the person they are trying to “help” […]

Bend, not Break

Bend, not Break As evidenced by the research of esteemed neuroscientist Louis Cozolino, 90% of the present moment is defined by our past experiences. Fear receptors in our brains act on information a split second before our thinking brain can come online. The fear is conditioned which means that you’ve associated something with negative experiences: […]

Shadow Work

Shadow Work In psychology terms, the term “shadow” is used to describe the parts within all of us that we may try to hide, suppress or deny. It was originally coined by psychoanalyst and psychiatrist Carl Jung (1975-1961). Our “shadow” comprises aspects of our personality that we deem to be shameful such as childhood traumas […]

The Silent Treatment

The Silent Treatment The silent treatment is the act of ignoring and excluding a person or group by another person or group. The silent treatment is one of the forms of ostracism that most of us have experienced.  In addition to the silent treatment, physical examples of ostracism are having written communication (text, email) not […]

The Myth of Catharsis

The Myth of Catharsis The term catharsis comes from the Ancient Greek word katharsis, which means purification/cleansing through the purging of emotions or the relieving of emotional tensions. The grandfather of psychology, Sigmund Freud revived the concept of catharsis. He believed that one needs to express bottled up negative emotions to avoid adverse psychological issues […]